Driving Personal and Professional Engagement

Photo by Larissa Gies on Unsplash

This article originally appeared on Medium.com 1/18/2021

One of the most important ingredients for happiness and well-being that is an underutilized tool for growth is the process of checking-in. This one tactic can improve our ability to be present with ourselves, our relationships, goal-setting, our work process, and generally the process of life.

Don’t “should all over yourself” but, really, checking-in should be a regular part of everybody’s process (in my humble opinion). Regular check-ins create a feedback loop of valuable information on which to base current and future actions.

It can be easy to fall into the repetition and monotony of life and let things settle into auto-pilot. While this can be helpful at times it can also lead us to passively engage with life which will ultimately diminish the quality of our experience.

If we find ourselves unable to actively participate in the process of life, whether it’s being present in our relationships, practicing self-care, or engaging in the process of our work, then checking-in with ourselves may yield some valuable insight. Checking-in with ourselves and others can help us discover unmet needs and other variables that may contribute to disconnection.

Based on the content of our check-ins, we can make adjustments to our process that can improve our ability to remain engaged and actively participate.

In one study, it was found that active student participation exerts a positive influence on achievement. In another study, it was found that students that participated 100% of the time scored 6% higher than students with less than 100% participation. From an organizational perspective, Gallup reports that “employee engagement continues to be an important predictor of company performance even in a tough economy.” In short, active participation and engagement drive results.

If you find that you are having difficulty, or unable to actively participate, in a given dimension of your life, then you are sabotaging yourself to some degree. Checking in with ourselves about the process can empower our ability to make needed changes and improve engagement.

Specific domains of our life we can use the process of checking-in to improve outcomes:

• Mental health

• Goals

• Relationships

• Organizational well being

Any domain of our life where we seek to make adjustments can be served by the process of checking-in. When we check-in with ourselves or others we are actively affirming and validating value. It communicates implicitly that the process is important to us, that we are important, that others are important. When we check-in, we are actively showing up to engage in the process. It actively shows and communicates that it matters.

Key ingredients to having successful check-ins:

• Be curious

• Perform check-ins consistently

• Create emotional safety

• Implement feedback received

• Follow up

Being curious has been linked to improved academic performance, worker innovation, strong relationships, and is a key ingredient in successful therapeutic sessions. Being curious during check-ins is essential to discovery and the ongoing process of growth.

Aside from being curious, check-ins should be performed at regular and consistent intervals to evaluate the effectiveness of the desired process. How is the process of cause and effect unfolding and it is leading to the desired outcome?

Check-ins should be performed in a non-threatening environment that allows for relaxed dialogue and exchange of ideas. Feedback received during check-ins should be used to make necessary and timely adjustments in behavior and process.

Successful check-ins can also help us determine when and where to set better boundaries. They can also help us understand where we have to lean in and contribute more to the ongoing process.

Questions that can help guide your process of checking-in with yourself or somebody else:

• How am I/are you doing in this moment?

• How am I/are you feeling right now?

• What’s coming up for me/you?

• What do I/you need?

• What’s working for me/you?

• What’s not working for me/you?

• What can I/you do differently?

• What can I/you do to be better?

• What do I/you lack?

While there are a seemingly endless list of questions we can ask to drive the process of checking-in, these are some that I hope can help you in your process. Over time you may find that some lend themselves to your process better than others. Stick with the ones that work and discard the ineffective ones.

I hope that this has inspired you to check-in more frequently with yourself and those around you or has contributed some fresh ideas to invigorate your process.